Work work work

Mixed feelings, have I....okay okay, no more Yoda talk...
The guy who gives me my tasks at work emailed this to me:
"We're winding down the data clean up. I just spoke with Victor and we understand that the data will never be "perfect" before we migrate. We also know that as you look at the data, you'll always find stuff that doesn't look right, but we have to blow the whistle at some point and let that be that."
When I took this job there was a fear of the possibility of the Data Clean up (which is what I do) would keep happening right up to the deadline of October 10th. (I start class on September 26th) So I agreed that I could work around my school schedule if needed. (I am getting paid $15/hr after all...) This was in many ways a relief since I knew my budget needs required that I work all the way thru the summer and I wasn't getting any work in the beginning! Now the possibility of ending early sounds great because this job has been mind numbingly obnoxious, however, I still need the money to make it thru summer. Ergo, I have mixed feelings.

Luke

Ringling!

As I write this post I am having a breakfast of Arizona Green Tea and Spicy Pork Rinds. (Yes, I know...my resolve is weak when it comes to food...I really really like Spicy Pork Rinds) Breakfast of champions? Probably not, but at least I'm not skipping breakfast, right? Anyway, I digress.

Yesterday, my family went to the Circus for the first time. Despite being Rock Concert loud, it was a lot of fun...well for most of us. Kesi wasn't able to enjoy until one of the nice attendants gave me a set of earplugs. After that she seemed to be able to enjoy it even if she wasn't very excited by it. N'tan and Arri were totally the opposite. N'tan's interested wavered with the act. Anything involving animals got his attention, especially the trained dogs. However, the stunts, high wire and clowns did not. Whenever it was people performers he was suddenly more interested in the little boy behind us. He kept waving and saying "Hi!" Arri was totally engrossed. She was awe struck by the acrobats and entertained by the animals. She seemed to be particularly interested in anyone who jumped or tumbled and laughed very loudly at all the clown antics. Afterwards, she told Melissa that she wanted to be able to jump that high. (There was one group of kids from "Inner city Chicago" that did pretty amazing jumping acrobatics.)

I personally enjoyed the comedy the most. The animal tricks were okay but not really phenomenal. And the acrobatics were good but definitely not on par with Cirque De Soleil. (Those freaks are amazing! I would love to see them live one of these days.)

On a darker note, there was a group protesting the circus. I took one of their pamphlets out of curiosity. It was pretty hyped up and therefore hard to believe, but they made some interesting points. After reading it, I began to wonder if they really did train the animals with pain instead of nuturing like the Ringling pamphlet claimed. The part that struck me was that they used the whips. Before dismissing my though, read this:
They were doing question and answer and one of the kids asked why the horse trainer was using whips. He said that the whips were similar to a conductors baton. They were something all the horse could see and be guided by and that when he snapped them on the ground all the horses could hear it over the noise and respond. Sounded reasonable to me, right up until the point that he had the horses rear up and walk on 2 legs. I watched carefully as he guided them gently with the whip. But then one seemed to waver for a second. He moved the whip in a much faster manner actually AT the horse. It didn't look fast enought to harm the animal, but the horse reacted very negatively. You could see it's mood change in it's eyes. It was Definitely afraid of the whip and it kicked at it with it's front hooves in what seemed like an almost desperate attempt to get the whip away. After it did this he raked the whip up and tapped its face. The whip didn't crack but the horse visible jerked its head away. He did this multiple times. I am not sure what to think. The horse was obviously not comfortable with this, maybe even afraid. The tiger trainer was a different story. The tigers never seemed uncomfortable. It appeared exactly as they explained it. That he played with them. Same with the dog trainer. I just don't know. Will have to look further into it...

Luke

Me in a nutshell...

Every now and again I stumble onto something that so well describes how I feel/am that it is disturbing! This is one of those links:
Luke's Brain
This actually opened up my eyes to somethings and perceptions that I had assumed were true but weren't...oy

Luke

Pig Meat

I don't think of myself as an activist, but I just have to say something:
Pig farming is disgusting.
I am watching the Discovery™ Show "Dirty Jobs" and the host is visiting a small pig farm. The first thing they do to the baby pigs is clip their teeth and tail with a pair of sharp pliers. Yes, CLIP their teeth and tails. And not only do the do that they let an amateur (the host) do it. The whole time the baby is freaking out and screaming. Of course, no anasthetics or anything. It was disgusting. Then after this painful experience they inject the baby pig in the neck with antibiotics and iron...apparently, the baby pig will die without both...these creatures are so overbred that they have an almost 0% survival rate without human intervention! And this is on a SMALL pig farm, this isn't even one of the 'infamous' manufacturing farms with thousands and thousands of pigs. The inhumanity of it continues in how the pigs are caged and handled and even bred. The females are bred via catheter. Ugh, I am grossed out and irked that people could be so cruel for the mild pleasure of some ham and bacon.

I don't agree with the reasons or tactics of PETA or GreenPeace but after seeing that I have to agree with them that eating pig's treated this way is to endorse inhumane practices. I have to say that for me, pig meat is now completely unappealing. Every time I see a piece of ham or bacon, I will remember that poor baby pig squealing in pain as the cut off his teeth and little tail.....

Luke

My Final Fantasy Life

I have come to the realization that one game has defined a large part of my life. That game is Final Fantasy 7. No other game has stuck with me as much. No other music pulls me back to another time and causes such emotion attachment. Even today, almost a decade since I first played the game, when I hear the music many old memories and feelings surface.

One area of my life that it most certainly affects is my view on any game, even nonRPGs. I almost always find myself comparing the intensity of the story of a new game to FF7's or listening carefully to the music to see if it holds similar weight. I have found several sound tracks that stir up emotions within myself but so far none that have quite the power of FF7's. Even a game like Metroid Prime that is a totally different genre got the FF7 comparison. I like the music of Metroid and the story line was one of the best in the Metroid series, but in the end the points that didn't quite hit the FF7 par came out. The funny part is it didn't make me like Metroid any less, but rather influenced me to write a story to further expound on the history of Samus Aran. A story which I am very happy with at the moment and fully intend to continue writing until it is finished.

Of course FF7 greatly influences my gaming. I have built RP's around its story line and borrowed its Materia system idea for my own games. I find myself drawing on it as a resource often. This is also true of other FF's tho. My personal game idea has used the FF series as a comparison point. I often modify my game idea to make sure it would compete with the newest FF and many other good games. Even if I have to admit the series took a very strange turn after FF7.

I don't know if my music tastes were affected by playing FF7, but I do know that I look deeper than the surface when it comes to music. I want a story, an idea that has meaning and depth in my music. I judge music on more than just whether it 'rocks' or not. I want to feel the piece, to know what it means and why it was written. My favorite songs all have either (or both) sentiment appeal because they were in my head during a certain period of my life or because the story behind them affects me emotionally. For example, Enter Sandman by Metallica does both. I used to suffer from nightmares (well still do on occasion) and the song speaks to that subject, but I also first heard it (and saw the video) on MTV when I was living at my dad's house in Oregon. Having just been taken there cause I was too much for my mother to handle (I was an ass to her at the point in my life and it was a very good decision on her part, my teen years were pretty nuts) I was in a new situation with a messed up dad, who didn't even interact with my brother and I despite the fact that we were now living with him. I spent many night staying up until the wee hours watching Nick at night or MTV. The video just hit me. And it sticks with me even now. She's Gone by Bloodgood and Secret Ambition by Michael W. Smith both are songs to that stick with me due to their own story. Both are intense songs that tell a story and are very good songs musically. The FF7 theme is the same as these songs and I relive the game's story every time I hear it.

I also think that FF7 sticks with me because I played it while I was a teen and going thru some many changes and discoveries about myself and my family. The main character in the game, Cloud, goes thru an amazing metamorphosis and discovery about his past in the game and as a teenager it was very easy to relate to him, because it felt sometimes like my life was almost as nuts.

Luke

Moving Day so soon....

Well due to continued vandalism of our van, the constant flow of beer cans and garbage tossed on our lawn, the lack of response from our landlord and the fact that we can get a 3 bedroom Duplex for almost the same price we are paying now, we are looking for a new place to move. I feel totally unprepared to move but we just can't stay where we are now.

The best deals seem to be in Gilroy at the moment. Not totally sure how I feel about that but we need to consider what is best for the whole family. This time we are definitely going for a place with washer and dryer and preferably a garage. I would like AC but we already have a window unit my father-in-law bought so it's not totally necesary.

Luke